Familiar Faces

As many of you know, I work in the Business Office. I'm quite a memorable worker, but only because of my name. But because I work the same afternoons consistently, there are also memorable customers. Why? Well, because as students we have schedules. If I have class all morning, but a break at 3 on Tuesdays, then naturally, I will get my 'errands' done during the 3 o'clock hour on Tuesdays. And if I frequently have to go the business office, then well, that worker with the ironic name is going to see me almost every Tuesday at 3.

Some people are embarrassed by it. They do the embarrassed laugh and kind of shake their heads and say, 'Do you work all the time? Because you are always the one to help me.' I laugh and assure them that it is indeed a common occurrence to see the same people over and over.

Some people things it's the best thing ever. "Mareena! I get to see you every time I come in here!" Most times I don't know these people outside of the BO (business office), which makes it even more great that they use my name and get so excited about seeing me. It's must be my natural charm and good looks!

Some people don't even notice. Or maybe they do, but they never say anything about it. I usually have a moment of indecision, deciding whether I should ask about some story or transaction that happened the last time I was working, but mortification at possibly being wrong propriety tends to win out. I mean, wouldn't you feel embarrassed if a teller asked about something that you didn't realize they knew . . . weird.No amount of natural charm can make up for that.

I enjoy building friendships with people and it's quite interesting to be able to do it while sitting behind a counter. Just one more of the great reasons to work on campus. I love my job!

Got Flexibility?

Here's what I've always thought I am: flexible.

Here's what I found out yesterday that I am not: flexible.

Here's what happened:

I have been able to be pretty heavily involved in ministry at my church in Greenville. I help direct children's choir, I teach the 4&5 yr old children's church, and I help in the 2&3 yr old nursery. Or at least, I did . . . until yesterday. Because they want to increase what the kids are learning in choir, they decided to make it on Wednesday night and put the music pastor in charge. I'm no longer needed to help in children's choir. Because they want to help the parents get more involved with the younger kids, they moved me from the 4&5s up to the 1st & 2nd graders. I'm no longer needed to teach the 4&5s. I didn't even get to tell them I wasn't going to be back to teach them. Because they moved children's choir to Wednesday, they had to change their regular Wednesday night program to Sunday night. And, you guessed it, they didn't need me in the nursery because the 3 yr olds go in with the older kids and the 2 yr olds are manageable with less people. So they sent me around asking if anyone needed help until I finally found an older kids group that needed an extra body.

And here's what I looked like on the outside: happy to help

Here's what I really was on the inside: NOT HAPPY TO HELP AT ALL

I wanted my little kids back. Oh sure, older kids are fine, but they don't hug me like the 3 yr olds and they also have this complex where they don't think I'm very funny, which is clearly untrue because all the 2-5 yr olds think I'm hilarious! And the older kids don't need me to read Jack & the Beanstalk 15x and use the big GIANT voice for the giant and tickle them and make them laugh. They also don't want to sing fun songs with big hand motions because obviously, that just isn't cool. And to top that off, they don't get a snack time! Yeah, I was pretty much not okay with my circumstances.

Here's what God did: convicted me of my selfishness.

I was supposed to be serving. This was a ministry.. Like I said, I've always considered myself to be flexible, but last night I realized that I was only willing to be flexible to a certain point. I had grabbed on to my ministries and made them my own personal achievements and my sources of fulfillment. Maybe that's why God thought it necessary to pull them away from me. Or maybe He just simply needed me to be available to other ministries because there was a need. I don't know exactly why it all worked out the way it did, but I know I definitely can't be effective when I'm pouting in the back of the room.

I'm still very sad to be taken away from my little kiddos, but with the Lord's strength I'll learn some flexibility and be able to minister in a different arena. Maybe I'll actually mature a little since I'm with older kids . . . .

m(r)

Gospel Worship

I was privileged to attend the Life By the Book 2011 conference today. Every message was clearly centered around the Gospel and challenged me to really think about my view of God, the church, and the gospel. I'm still trying to sort out everything I heard today, because sometimes there is so much truth packed into one sermon that it seems almost impossible to comprehend it all in one sitting. So I'm going to mull it over and then go listen to the sermon audios from the conference, mull it over some more, and then perhaps listen again. It was excellent.

Lately, it seems as though I've been hearing a lot about Michal, King David's first wife. She was mentioned in Bible class, I read through a section about her in a commentary while doing a study on somebody completely different, I read a short fiction book that was based on her story, and she was mentioned in chapel. Kind of a strange conglomeration of things that just kept her story present in my mind.

Today at the conference, one of the speakers spoke on true fellowship - how it flows from our fellowship with God and into our fellowship with one another. There are certain issues that Christians differ on, but that doesn't mean we can't have fellowship. Good, solid stuff. We moved right into a song following the message. As we began to sing Beneath the Cross of Jesus, I started to see hands popping up over the congregation. Not many, but a few. Men and women raising their hands in worship to the Lord. I was a little taken aback because . . . well, honestly, it's just not how my church is. We don't move much during our song services at all. You won't find any lifted and outstretched hands in the congregation.

But then I stopped. And I thought about it. Did I have anything against this particular manifestation of worship? Not really. I had never done it, but that doesn't mean it's wrong, right? I mean, sometimes the words of a song will hit me and the next thing you know, I've got tears drippin' down my face as I try and sing with some semblance of dignity. Instead of crying, they lift their hands to God. I was still formulating this in my mind when I thought of Michal's experience with open, joyful worship.

And David danced before the LORD with all his might; and David was girded with a linen ephod. So David and all the house of Israel brought up the ark of the LORD with shouting, and with the sound of the trumpet. And as the ark of the LORD came into the city of David, Michal Saul's daughter looked through a window, and saw king David leaping and dancing before the LORD; and she despised him in her heart. 
2 Samuel 6:14-16

Michal saw David openly praising the Lord without thought of what others were thinking, and she despised him  in her heart. Obviously Saul wasn't the type to leap before the Lord with praise. How often have I looked at someone that worships differently than I do with a sort of disdain, feeling superior to them because of my conservative worship? How absolutely wrong of me. Who am I to judge the heart? Their actions weren't an act of pride, not a 'look-at-me' gesture, but just an openness before the Lord in worship. The second verse of the song says,

Beneath the cross of Jesus, his family is my own
Once strangers chasing selfish dreams, now one through grace alone
How could I now dishonor the ones that you have loved?
Beneath the cross of Jesus see the children called by God.


I only knew 3 or 4 people in that room, but singing that song made me realize that we are all a family in Christ. Our common bond is the gospel and our salvation through grace. Who am I? Nothing but a sinner saved by grace, just like everyone else in the room. Arms outstretched, arms to the sides, dry eyes, eyes full of tears, loud rejoicing, quiet praising . . . it didn't matter your position. As we sang to our Savior, I knew that I was among the children called by God. What a wonderful God He is.


m(r)